Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Our new baby, installment #12

Continuing the story of our experience with a home birth midwife, at one of our visits we discussed the logistics of what would happen when I went into labor -- who would watch the other two boys, a four-year-old and my 11-year-old stepson. We have many nice neighbors with kids of their own, and we could probably ask them for a favor. But still, I felt as if the right person for the job was my own mother. She's a very attentive grandmother. The boys adore her. But she is a terrible Nervous Nelly. Could she deal with being in the house when I was in labor? With my first son, I vowed I would not call her until after the baby was born, to save her the fret. (I crumbled, and called her on the way to the hospital.) She did, however, keep it together when she saw me wheeled out of the operating room, post-unwanted c-section. I was devasted and exhausted. She was nothing but supportive. Still, she and I were not on the same page this time. She was horrified by the idea of a home birth. It was time for a heart-to-heart with her.

14 comments:

mom said...

So, here's where we hear all the rules. But before we do I just had one (of many) scenarios I needed to run by you. If you say to me "get me to the hospital" while you're in labor,for whatever reason and your team thinks it's not necessary, what exactly would you like me to do? Walk away from you? You needed to know that my cell phone would be predialed to 9-1...
That's all!

randiedoula said...

Obviously these comments are silly as you are recounting a story that has already occurred. However, I would ask if it was possible for the kids to go to her house. When I labored with my second I was sure my older child would be a distraction, so as soon as things got intense, off to grandmas she went.

Amanda said...

the most wonderful gift my mother has ever given me id attending the births of my children.

mom said...

Well, Randiedoula, I know my blogs sound flip but they are closer to the truth than they are silly. With your experience as a doula a home birth is not out of the ordinary like it was for us. I had many concerns for Tina and her unborn baby. We did have a plan for the boys - Tina's dad would take them home while I stayed with Tina, her midwives and her husband. The fact that we live 50 miles away proved to be a little tricky. And, Amanda, I think having your mom with you while you give birth is wonderful. That was our plan too. Stay tuned!

randiedoula said...

Please let me clarify- I was not saying your comments are silly, I meant my suggestions as to how to handle children at a birth were silly
because your baby has already arrived.

mom said...

randiedoula, thanks for the clarification. I thought you were referring to my cell phone being predialed! And quite frankly it does sound silly. I am so thankful that my daughter was able to get past all the drama in the family.

mommymichael said...

try dealing with a father-n-law that calls your midwives "witch doctors". his seriousness "hidden" behind a joke.
"i don't like this home birth 'thing' you do"

good thing you're not the one doing it then!! this will be our 2nd home birth!

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